Putting and End to Procrastination
Breaking Free - Part 5 of 8
I Cor. 10:13
I want you to imagine a giant screen where we could put every single thought you've had in the last week
for everybody to see...every thought you’ve had about someone else...every desire...everything. Would
you feel uncomfortable? Have you ever been praying when all of a sudden a totally off the wall thought
goes through your mind? You wonder, "Where in the world did that come from? I'm supposed to be a
Christian. Where did I get that idea?"
I Cor. 10:13 says, "The wrong desires that come into your life aren't anything new or different.
Many others have faced exactly the same problems before you. And no temptation is irresistible
[Circle this]. God will show you how to escape." I find this verse incredibly reassuring. First,
it says everybody faces temptation. Even Jesus was tempted. However, the Bible promises that God
will provide a way out, a way of escape. Friends, it's not a sin to be tempted. The sin comes
when we give in to temptation. You can't keep the birds from flying across your head, but you can
keep them from making a nest in your hair.
I want to talk with you this morning about how to break free from the temptations that can destroy
marriage. Because no one is beyond the possibility of temptation, let me share with you today
five ways to avoid the fatal attractions that can destroy marriage.
First, make a commitment to keep God's standards. Decide early on in marriage to do what the Bible
says. Ps. 119:9 reads, "How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your Word."
We've been hearing a lot on values and how we need to build our life on values. I submit to you
the best place and the safest place to get your values is to look at God's instruction manual,
the Bible. It has stood the test of time. It has provided guidance for years and years. It won't
lead us wrong.
I've listed some verses that talk about God's specific standard in relation to sex. While it will be
clear that God says sex is to be enjoyed in marriage, until you settle that God’s Word is the standard
for your life you're going to fall for all kinds of temptations.
Second, if you want to avoid fatal attractions, maintain your marriage. One way to do so is by keeping
the courtship alive. This is perhaps the greatest insurance for a happy home life. Prov. 5:18-19
says, "Rejoice in your wife. Let her charms and tender embrace satisfy you. Let her love alone
fill you with delight." If there was more courting in marriages there would be fewer marriages
in court. Keep your love life alive. Rejoice in your mate! Find satisfaction in him or her alone.
Another important way to do so is by keeping the communication channels open. I heard a story
about a farmer who walked into a lawyer’s office one day in a small town. "May I help you?"
asked the lawyer. The farmer said, "Yeah. I need to get me one of them...dee-vorcees." "Well,
do you have any grounds?" asked the lawyer. "Oh, yeah," said the farmer. "I got me about 140
acres." "No, you don’t understand," said the lawyer. "I mean, do you have... a case?" "Naw,
don’t have no Case, but I do got a John Deere and a Massey Ferguson." "No," said the lawyer.
"You still don’t understand. I mean, do you have a grudge?" "‘Course I got a grudge! That’s
where I park my John Deere at." "No sir, I’m sorry," said the lawyer. "You still don’t seem to
understand. I need to know if you have a suit." "Well yessir, sure do. Wear it to church every
Sunday!" said the farmer. "We don’t seem to be getting anywhere here," said the lawyer. "Sir,
does your wife beat you up or anything?" "Naw, we both get up about 4:30 every day." "Okay,"
the lawyer said. "Let me put it this way: Why do you want to divorce your wife?!" "Well," said
the farmer, "I can’t never have no meaningful conversation with her."
Friends, your spouse is supposed to be your best friend, so talk with him! Talk with her! Tell
her how much you love her. Tell him how much he means to you. Discuss your plans, and thoughts
and feelings with each other. A little more courting and a lot more communication will go a
long way toward maintaining marriages.
Third, you can avoid fatal attractions that lead people astray if you will manage your mind. We
need to understand how temptation works. James 1:14-15 says, "Temptation is the pull of our own
evil thoughts and wishes. These thoughts lead to evil actions." The battle starts in the mind.
You say, "I'd never do anything. I'm just dreaming about it." Who are you kidding? Watch salesmen.
First they get your attention, then they move from the mental stage to the feeling
stage - "Try the coat on. See how it feels." "Have a sample of rocky road ice cream", "Get
in the car and take it for a test drive". If he gets your feelings you're a goner. Thoughts
determine feelings and feelings determine actions. The key is to change your mental thoughts.
That’s why the internet can be so dangerous. With such easy access to pornography today, it is
easy to let the mind wander in the wildest of fantasies in the privacy of your home, while rationalizing,
"There’s no harm in just looking. I’d never do anything!" Jesus said in Matthew 5:28 "Anyone
who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Manage
your mind. 2 Timothy 2:22 says, "Run from anything that gives you evil thoughts, but stay close
to anything that makes you want to do right." Manage your mind.
Fourth, minimize the opportunities for temptation. If you want to avoid a fatal attraction don't
allow yourself in situations where it could happen. Jesus said in Matthew 6:41 "Keep watch, and
pray so that you will not fall into temptation."
"Keep watch" - be alert, be wise. Know the situations that tempt you, that get you off base. One of
the problems today is that married partners spend less time with each other than ever before.
Opportunities to be unfaithful abound. Jesus’s advice was to keep watch. Be alert. Avoid
compromising situations. Minimize the opportunity. It would be better to change jobs than
to be unfaithful to your mate.
I read once that a panel of women debated on who they thought was the perfect man. You’d have
thought it might be famous actor or wealthy tycoon. But the final conclusion of this panel was
that the Perfect Man was actually....MR. POTATO HEAD.
Their reasoning: He’s tan. He’s cute. He knows the importance of accessorizing. And if he looks
at another girl, you can rearrange his face.
What do you do if you're caught off guard and find yourself in a tempting situation? What do you do
if for whatever reason you find yourself beginning to be attracted to someone other than your spouse?
Jesus tells us to pray. Right then, on the spot, you say, "God, help me get out of this situation. Give
me strength not to give in." You turn to God at once and ask for him to protect you from your own
weaknesses.
Finally, if you want to avoid those fatal attractions, take seriously the consequences. When you’re
tempted there may be a voice inside saying, "This is no big deal." The Bible says "There is pleasure
in sin for a season." If sin hurt right away nobody would do it. Sooner or later, however, it will
hurt. Paul said in I Thess. 4:3, 6: "This is God's will for you; he wants you to be holy and completely
free from immorality. The Lord will punish those who do such wrongs." God's serious about this. He
takes a hard line about purity. We need to take seriously the consequences of disobedience.
Maybe you are thinking, "I know people who have had affairs, one night flings, and they got
away
with it." Friends, God does not settle all of his accounts in 30 days. The Scripture says,
"God is not mocked. Whatever a man sows he will eventually reap." It's inevitable. What we
sow we will reap inevitably in our life. It's just a matter of time.
We must take seriously the consequences of giving into a temptation. We should also take
seriously the benefits of obedience. James 1:12 says, "Blessed is the one who perseveres
under temptation, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the victor's crown,
the life God has promised to those who love him."
Some of you are saying, "This message is too late. I’ve already messed up. I wish I had heard
this ten years ago." I want to say to you that there is forgiveness in Jesus Christ. He offers
us fresh starts. He will wash us clean and give us a new life, not just a new leaf. I
challenge you to say, "From today on, I'm going to be a person of purity. I’m going to be
faithful to my spouse." Ask for forgiveness from God and anyone else you have hurt. Then go on.
I’m glad that I can stand before you and say that I have been faithful to Patty. By the grace
of God I intend to be faithful to her the rest of my life. Why? Number one, I love Jesus Christ.
I owe everything I have to Jesus Christ. To hurt him would be unbearable. Number two, I love
Patty and my kids. I couldn’t bear the thought of hurting them. Number three, I understand
the consequences.
How do you avoid a fatal attraction? How do you live morally in an immoral world, when you're
being bombarded constantly by temptations?
First, make a commitment to God's standard. Say, "God says that sex outside of marriage is
out." That doesn't matter if you're divorced, single, young, old. It's out! Maintain God's standard.
Second, maintain your marriage if you're married. Take all the energy you've been using to
fantasize about other people, to dream about others, and focus that energy in your marriage
and watch what happens.
Third, manage your mind. Fill your mind with things that are holy and pure.
Fourth, minimize the opportunities. It's not "How close to the cliff can I get and not fall
off.", "How close to the fire can I get and not get burned", "How much can I flirt around
at the office and not fall". That's the wrong attitude for a Christian. It should be "How
close can I get to the Lord and stay there?"
Fifth, take seriously the consequences, both the blessings of obedience and the curse of
disobedience.
By the way, if you are single, or widowed, or just don’t think this message applies to you,
let me just point out that these points can apply to any area of temptation in our lives. It
is up to you to decide where to apply them.
This morning I challenge those of you who are married to make a commitment: "By God's grace I
will be faithful to my mate the rest of my life. I can't do it on my own. In this culture, I
will be tempted. But with God's grace and help, I will be faithful."
To the teenagers and those of you who are single, I challenge you to wait for God's best. Save
yourself for marriage. You will save yourself so many problems if you will. Save yourself.
And don’t commit yourself to another until you are sure you will be faithful to him or her
for the rest of your life. Make this commitment: "By God's grace I will keep myself pure
until I find God’s perfect mate for me."
I hope all of you will say, "God, I come to you and give you every area of my life right now.
Forgive me. Clean my life. And give me the power to be what you want me to be from here on out." Amen
Brother Polk preached a series of sermons on baptism you may enjoy by following these links.
Baptism - A Meaningful Act | Jump Right In - the Water is Fine
A Paper on Infant Baptism | Infant Baptism?
